On Fathers Day these words have been on my heart and mind. Have you ever heard the song by Brad Paisley called “He Didn’t Have To Be”. If not you should. I’m sure it will remind you of someone in your life and will most likely bring you to years…it does me!
For those that don’t know this song, it is about a man’s view of his life and the man he calls Dad. The song talks about his mom dating and how this man she dated included him from the beginning. Through out his childhood this man loved him and the child loved him right back. They weren’t blood but that didn’t matter. As the child, who is now a man waits for the birth of his first child he prays that he can be half the Dad that his Dad didn’t have to be.
This song reminds me of two of the most phenomenal men I have be blessed to have in my life. The first is my Grandpa Jim, who passed away 2 years ago. When he married my Grandma it was after my Dad and Aunt were born and were much older. He didn’t have children before he got married and never had children with my Grandma. However, you would have never known that. He loved my Dad and Aunt like they were his own.
When my sister, brother and I came along he poured his entire heart and soul into us. He mentored us, played cards with us, got silly with us, believed in us, encouraged us and loved us unconditionally. We weren’t blood but I am here to tell you he was the only Grandpa I ever knew and I loved him with every ounce of my soul. My kids also loved their PopPop and I am so greatful that they all got to know and love him. He truly is what every man should aspire to be, I Love him and I Honor him because He didn’t have to be.
The other man is my husband Scott. When we first started dating 15 years ago my son Tyler had just turned 5. From the very beginning he wanted to meet my son and get to know him. I was very leery of this because I just didn’t believe in introducing my son to the person I was seeing until I saw where things were going. However, from the very beginning Scott was different. Their relationship had some growing pains in the beginning because Tyler never had a true father figure.
As our family grew and his little brother came along we finally started finding our way as a family. Through out the years I have been so blessed to see the relationship between our son and my husband grow. They share a bond like nothing I have seen. They talk on the phone for hours about music, which is a passion they both share. Whenever Scott starts talking about Ty, out of the blue he calls. I think my biggest joy is when people say how much they look alike. Fighting back tears, I just nod and say “They do don’t they.”
Our son is now 20, living on his own, has been supporting himself with a full-time job he has had for over a year now and starts college in the fall. He truly is the man he is today because of the amazing example of what a true man is by the man that IS his Dad even though he didn’t have to be.
I am beyond blessed to have him be my husband and the extraordinarily amazing Dad to our kids. I Love You Scott Today, Tomorrow and Always.